WHAT TO DO and WHAT NOT TO DO

if you think you are being stalked
 

1.   First, tell the unrequited person that no further contact of any kind is allowed.

• As early as possible, tell him/her that the relationship is over.

• Be as firm and direct as possible.

• Avoid using tones or phrases that  try to “be nice” and to “spare feelings” because the person being rejected may perceive these as mixed messages, and thus a license to continue unwanted contact.

2.   Try to avoid contact with the stalker, as difficult as this can be.

• The victim often has little control over attempted contact.

• If children's visitation is a factor, seek a supervised visitation site, perhaps at your local domestic violence program.

• Ask friends, family or the police for help.

3.   Documentation is one of the most important aspects of managing a stalking threat because it establishes a course of conduct.

• Write a complete description of each suspected act by the stalker--even the "little things."

• Include the date and time.

• Keep this documentation in a safe place, somewhere the stalker cannot find and destroy it.